Venting all of us do it, whether we are an active caregiver or not, venting is something natural to everyone. Therapists will tell you that venting is a form of processing or of taking stock of what is truly happening and how it makes us feel. Venting also is a way of letting others in. However, it is in how they react to us that allows the venting to properly work or efficiently fail.
Usually the reason why venting fails is because the listener is not truly focusing on what is being said. Instead, they are searching for an answer, thinking of a reply or the magic thing that will make you feel better. When in reality all you need is for them to quietly listen and validate how you are feeling.
Because venting is a natural process, it is normal that those we care for also seek to vent and be validated. If someone with memory loss begs to go home, is this complaining or venting? Perhaps if we took the time to validate their feelings they too would feel better. A successful validation process happens when you use the following techniques:
Centering – means to put aside your own feelings, shut off all of the noise inside and surrounding you, and just listen. Observing – focus solely on the person, while watching their body language and verbal cues. Are they fidgeting or calm, lips tight or smiling, hands tensed or flaccid etc…?
Empathizing – changing your body/emotions to reflect theirs. Once you make a match, you can slowly morph your demeanor and lead them into a more calm relaxed state.
Verbal/Nonverbal Techniques – using a clear, warm tone ask open-ended questions, rephrase answers, ask extreme or opposite questions, reminisce, mirror their body language, maintain deep eye contact and provide reassuring touch.
Ending Positively – usually the conversation will come to a natural end how there may be a time where you need to directly disengage. Whatever happens it is at this time that you should take time to validate the person; how they were feeling and that you were glad to be there for them. It also is a great opportunity to tell them honestly how you feel about them in a positive manner, thereby boosting their self-worth.
By using these techniques, we can help those we care for feel validated and valued. In doing so, you will find it will naturally lead to your own personal validation too.
My father has been here only a little over 2 months. The positive change in him has been DRAMATIC! I would HIGHLY recommend Azura........ I would give it 10 stars if they allowed it! This is the premier facility for any family member with cognitive issues! They do treat residents like family, believe it!
Review posted by Stephen Diedrich
The staff at Oak Creek are all fabulous! It takes special people to care for our loved ones. If has been a trying year for all and the staff at oak creek get a shout out for their kindness and compassion they give to my mom and the others. They have all gone above and beyond to make things seem as normal as possible for my mom! All of the staff have been so helpful and kind! They are all fabulous!!
Review posted by Mary Kubacki
"We want to thank you for the loving special care you took of our mother, Diane. It was truly mom's home and you all became part of our family. Everything was home for her....from the beautiful rooms, large sunny windows all around, good food made with love, fun and personal activities from people who really loved our mom. We would highly recommend your facility to anyone. The staff from the director, to the doctor, to the nurse, to the caregivers and the maintenance man were all extremely helpful, caring, loving and professional. There are not enough words to say how much we appreciate all of you. Your exceptional care, kindness, and love were beyond anything we could have imagined. You were part of our family, and we will miss you." - Gail Sommers and Deborah Guse
Review posted by Gail Sommers & Deborah Guse
Just moved my sister-in-law to Azura Stoughton on February 12th. I feel like I’ve found a little piece of dementia heaven. The staff has gone way beyond my expectations to meet her needs and take time to know her. Anyone who has dementia deserves the TLC they receive at Azura. I’m so impressed.
Review posted by Gail Aaroen
Thank you to the Azura Memory Care team, Sheboygan location for the amazing, loving care they provided my dad. They truly loved and cared for my dad as if he was their own. It is such a warm, loving, family environment I only wish we would have moved my dad there years earlier!
Review posted by Patti Bunch
Review posted by Ron Paxson
I have enjoyed working with patients at Azura Care as a Physical Therapist Assistant. The staff has been very helpful in sharing important information about the patients to make their therapy sessions as productive as possible. They are open to learning techniques to help keep patients safe and improve their ability to perform daily tasks with less assistance. Their interactions with patients show caring and compassion with a focus on the needs of each individual to enjoy the best quality of life possible.
Review posted by Barb Eisenberg
The journey of caregiving for my Aunt started over 4 years ago. It has been a very long difficult journey. It is hard to watch and frustrating to watch a loved one decline, as well as for them to live the decline. My Aunt found her final peace at Azura Memory Care in Sheboygan. It was not only her peace but mine as well. I no longer had to worry about her care as I could see that she was loved by her Azura family. She passed away on June 21 and they knew how important that it was for me to be there, but I also found peace that if I was not there, she was with family that loved her. No words can express the appreciation for the care, compassion and love that they have for all their residents. God has opened many doors through my journey and the doors at Azura were truly a gift from God. This family made a difference in a long journey. I will always have them in my thoughts and prayers. They are where and doing what they are meant to do!